On Her Majesty's Secret Service - We Have all the time in the World

Out of the twenty-six Bond films (yes, I include Never Say Never Again in that), I think the very best is On Her Majesty's Secret Service. And if it isn't number one, it's certainly in the Top Five.

That opinion may surprise some people because it isn't the first film that usually comes to mind. I know... sacrilege, right? How can a Sean Connery Bond movie not be the best?

Interestingly, this opinion has become far less unusual over the last couple of decades. For many years, On Her Majesty's Secret Service was treated as something of an oddity in the Bond canon, a movie remembered mostly for being the one without Connery. However, as audiences and critics have revisited the film, its reputation has grown significantly. Today, many longtime Bond fans rank it alongside classics such as From Russia with Love, Goldfinger, Casino Royale, and License to Kill as one of the strongest entries in the entire series.

So while it may not be the first Bond film many people name, it is no longer a fringe opinion to argue that On Her Majesty's Secret Service belongs among the very best.

While I think Connery was excellent in the role, I'm not convinced he was the best Bond. That honor might actually belong to Timothy Dalton, but that's a discussion for another day.

At the time, George Lazenby had the impossible task of replacing Connery as 007. A near-complete unknown, it would be his only outing as the British super-spy, but what an outing it was.

I won't go too deeply into the story in case anyone reading this hasn't seen the film, but I will say this: On Her Majesty's Secret Service presents perhaps the most human depiction of James Bond in the entire series.

The action has also aged remarkably well. Nearly all of the skiing, car chases, and fight scenes rely on practical effects and real stunt work, giving the film an authenticity that many modern action movies struggle to match.

And then there's the villain.

Blofeld is played by none other than Telly Savalas. "Who loves ya, baby?" Oops... wrong role! But seriously, you can't go wrong with Savalas. His Blofeld is physically imposing, intelligent, and genuinely threatening.

Unlike Connery's effortlessly cool Bond or Roger Moore's more lighthearted and gadget-driven interpretation, Lazenby's Bond feels personal. He gets hurt. He doubts. He falls in love. He feels like a real person instead of an indestructible icon.

Some critics have focused on Lazenby's inexperience as an actor, and there's certainly some truth to that. Unfortunately, every performance was inevitably compared to Connery's, making the transition even more difficult. Looking back today, however, I think Lazenby deserves far more credit than he usually receives. When compared to Ian Fleming's novels, his interpretation is actually one of the closest to the Bond Fleming wrote.

Then there's Diana Rigg.

Contessa Teresa di Vicenzo, aka Tracy Bond

Wow.

Most younger viewers know her as Olenna Tyrell from HBO's Game of Thrones. Fewer realize that during the 1960s she was widely regarded as one of Britain's great screen beauties and style icons.

More importantly, Tracy isn't just another "Bond girl."

She's intelligent, independent, capable in a fight, and never feels like she's simply there to admire Bond. She challenges him emotionally in ways very few characters ever do.

And then... there's the ending.

As Bond says:

"We have all the time in the world."

It's one of the most emotional moments in the franchise and one of the reasons this film has only grown in stature over the decades.

In many ways, Diana Rigg's performance feels effortless because she brought so much of her own wit, confidence, and personality to the role. Anyone familiar with her career: from The Avengers to Game of Thrones, knows she possessed that commanding screen presence throughout her life.

Some readers may be wondering, "Tracy Bond? Who's that?"

If you've never heard of her in connection with the other Bond films, there's a reason. Watch On Her Majesty's Secret Service and you'll find out. The character is referenced in several later Bond movies, but they're subtle enough that many viewers miss them. Because On Her Majesty's Secret Service spent so many years being overlooked within the Bond canon, those references are easy to overlook as well.

So there you have it.

I think On Her Majesty's Secret Service has the strongest claim to being the greatest Bond film ever made; or, at the very least, it belongs comfortably in the Top Five.

Now of course the natural question what does this have to do with anything? Well, once again a gamer of the right age range? Top Secret of course, but even better? Victory games James Bond 007!

In a future article I'll attempt the impossible task of ranking every Bond film to determine which one truly deserves the top spot. Stay tuned.

Are you a Bond fan? If so, which Bond film do you think is the best? Let me know in the comments.

The Place Where It All Happened: My Hometown, the ’80s Hobby Scene, and the Luck of Location

I wrote about THE CAMPAIGN back in 2014: that first long, magical AD&D run that still feels like the zenith of my gaming life. About how things changed afterwards as mirrored by Stranger Things and Growing Up in the 80s.

But there’s another piece of that story I’ve been turning over lately. It’s not just when it happened. It’s where.

Rochester, New York in the 1980s wasn’t New York City. It wasn’t the Twin Cities or Chicago. It was a mid-sized industrial city with big companies (Kodak, Xerox) that hadn’t yet collapsed, a couple of strong universities (U of R and RIT); and, for a brief, perfect window, a surprisingly deep hobby scene.

That location mattered more than I appreciated at the time.

The Narrow Window

I got my Moldvay Basic Set for Christmas 1982. I wasn’t in the absolute first wave of players, but I was close enough to catch the rising tide. By the time Warhammer Fantasy Battle 3rd edition arrived in my area in early 1988, my friends and I were right in the middle of high school, the perfect age for that kind of deep, obsessive hobby dive.

The window for pre-4th edition Warhammer in the US was tiny. Maybe three and a half years. GW’s management buyout in late 1991 was already pushing things toward 4th edition. We hit the sweet spot dead center.

Change any of those variables and the whole experience changes. Born a couple years earlier and it might have been too soon, the scene wasn’t there yet. Born later and we would have only known 4th edition and beyond. But my position in my generational cohort put me exactly where I needed to be.

Why Rochester Mattered

Not every town had this. Places like say Kansas or smaller rural areas often had one (maybe) game store, if they were lucky. Rochester had 3–5 active stores at points in the late ’80s. The industrial base that hadn’t yet hollowed out, plus the colleges, created enough of a critical mass of nerds, engineers, and creative types to sustain a real hobby infrastructure.

It wasn’t a huge leap from Lake Geneva for TSR stuff, and the Games Workshop distribution pipeline reached us reasonably well in those early days. That combination: decent distribution + local density, was rarer than it felt at the time. We just didn't know it.

By the mid-’90s the scene had contracted. Crazy Egor’s (I actually know Egor/Paul; he lived my home town) became Millennium Games. A couple of other stores hung on for a time, but for a stretch it was spotty. The golden window had closed.

The Ghost of Place

Rereading my earlier posts about THE CAMPAIGN and the Citadel Giant saga, I keep coming back to how much location shaped what we got to experience. The same way the show Stranger Things uses Hawkins as more than just a backdrop, it’s part of the feeling; Rochester was part of ours.

We didn’t have the monster-of-the-week drama. We had basement tables, multiple stores to browse on weekends, friends who were all hitting that same perfect age at the same time, and a brief era when Warhammer 3rd edition felt like the center of the universe.

It wasn’t perfect. It was rough around the edges, like most real memories. But it was ours.

And like the friendships that formed around those tables, some of it faded as people moved on with life. But the place where it happened? That still feels special. I ended up back in my hometown, the same place where so much of it started. The man cave is here. The dogs are here. The memories are here.

Sometimes the luck isn’t just in the timing. It’s in the coordinates.

The Ghost of the ’80s didn’t just haunt the games we played. It haunted the town where we played them.

How about you? If you are around my age (smack dab in the middle of Gen X) does this sound familiar? 

Dungeon Magazine #46- Iron Orb of the Duergar – Old School AD&D Thoughts and a Review

Dungeon Magazine #46 - Iron Orb of the Duergar
by Peter Aberg
An adventure for 6-8 PCs, levels 11-15

Tipping the scales at 22 pages Iron Orb of the Duergar is one of the best modules in any edition hands down. In fact I would say this module can hold its own with any of the classic modules as well. Dungeon #46 is a seminal product for me as it is the second Dungeon Magazine that I personally bought and it leaps off the pages on first read.

Iron Orb of the Duergar is generic enough that it can easily be set in any cold mountains region without much difficulty and has a nice Norse/barbarian feel to it. In fact the author suggests Icewind Dale for the Forgotten Realms or the Archbarony of Ratik for the World of Greyhawk; for my campaign world it was a snap.

This module is fairly straightforward and has lots of combat! There is some nice back story to it however and the whole feel is one of a more regional/kingdom level feel to it rather than adventuring at the local dungeon a few miles away from town.

The module centers on northmen raids... or so it seems. True, barbarian raiders are striking the southern kingdoms, but not as it seems. Reason being? The Iron Orb of the Duergar; a powerful artifact that has gotten itself attached to Ulmvard the High Priest of Odin. Normally such a figure might be able to cope, however the malignant orb has the powers of a beholder and duergar!

The adventure starts out assuming that the PCs are perhaps local rulers of some of the more southern lands (they might be considering level of play for this module) or contacted by such. They head out across the sea towards the Northmen's lands to investigate. Once the PCs arrive on scene they find out that Ulmavard has switched focus to now is planning on attacking the local dwarfs instead of raiding cities to the south. This is a bit odd given the fact that all of the summer months have been focused on raiding the south... a clever PC will pick up on why is this man talking about making war on dwarfs?

Ulmvard the High Priest of Odin is a bit...unhinged

Having to enter the city clandestinely the PCs will make their way to an inn (they always do). From there they eventually fall into the camp opposing the slightly unhinged High Priest of Odin. Enter the High Priest's daughter Anja who fills in the holes for the PCs. A group plans to seize the Orb realizing that Ulmvard is not himself. It just so happens that the Orb can scry and all too soon the PCs need to flee the city and head towards the mountains. Here is where things start to get good.

The mine is old that was once abandoned, but is now run by Norse guards (some frost giants) and slave labor (garnered from the raids of the PCs homelands) at the behest of Ulmvard. The upper levels are logical and well mapped and the descriptions give a great feel to it. The random encounters are perfect and quick thinking PCs will notice there is more than meets the eye here.

The whole point of the upper level culminates with the revelation that the PCs are not the only ones interested in the operations here and those of Ulmvard. The drow make an appearance and it is not the usual setup! They propose a temporary alliance which is a nice break from the fight them at a drop of a hat mentality... The dark elves have no desire to see their enemies assemble the Iron Warrior either. Make no mistake the dark elves are not friends of the PCs, but it is the old "the enemies of my enemy is my friend". Depending on the race/class makeup of the PCs it will be interesting to see what the more lawful/good types in a party might think about working with dark elves. Either way they do not accompany the group during the adventure and are off quickly.

The ruins of the duergar citadel are awesome, the first time I read this I imagined it quite vividly and the author did a great job with the descriptions, they really seem to come to life. It really captures a feeling and you can imagine the historical perspective of it. I especially liked the ruined nature of side corridors to get around the original collapsed sections, it really lends an authentic air to it. The way to get to the other side is imaginative as well and presents some great combat opportunities as well as real and present danger: falling into lava will ruin your day. The author also provides little back story snippets as to why the ruins is the way it is now, and ones that can easily be added to a campaign.

Once to the other side, the potential for large sweeping, knock down, drag em out fight(s) is right there. The rest of the ruins can become one massive battle if the PCs are not careful in their approach to tactics. There are plenty of duergar and being dwarfs they do not fight stupidly.

After breaching the upper level the forge level awaits! There is some nice flavor text here to add even more visual appeal, one can almost imagine the dwarfs sealing up and mounting the great doors after they defeated the duergar in ages past. Again there are little back story snippets that tell the DM why things are the way they are now and possibly lead to further adventures.

The riddle is a nice touch for proceeding northwards as well, if a bit easy to solve.

The final fight can go either way and the drow party makes a nice option for the DM should he need reinforcements for the PCs. Conversely if they treated the drow with the unusual reaction the drow might turn on a weakened party at the very end while they themselves hang back and let the two factions slug it out in the main fight.

Everything hinges on this fight, and the PCs need to triumph or they are in for it.

Strengths

The first strength of the module is its level requirements. All too often it is tough to challenge high level parties. If the party does not stop the plans of Ulmvard in time they are going to have a BIG problem on their hands, and I mean big ;) If this happens the PCs might want to run...

Another thing that makes this module work so well is the use of duergar as the movers and shakers along with Ulmvard. I am hard pressed to think about where there have been other modules that feature duergar this prominently. It would have been even better with derro, but I digress! ;)

The atmosphere leaps off the page from the human cities to especially the duergar ruins. The artwork of the module really lends its support as well.

The dark elves are a nice touch and create some great moral dilemmas for some of the PCs depending on the group.

The orb itself is a great item and a great way to rally lead the PCs on, especially if one of them is foolish enough to use it. The fact that it is an artifact that cannot easily be destroyed only adds to this.

This module begs for follow up. Especially if the PCs are successful in thwarting the machinations of Ulmvard! So they defeated him and stopped him from placing the orb. Now what? The Orb needs to be destroyed and it is not an easy task to do. This would be a great followup here. Plus it is entirely up to the DM as to just how this should happen or can it even be done?

Weaknesses

To be honest there are very few here and for the most part it is me being nit-picky and all are easily solved. In fact as I note depending on your campaign some of these might not even be weaknesses.

One thing that comes to mind is the weakness of having Ulmvard's daughter play the role of the guy in the tavern with the mission.. it is a minor point, but one to consider. Someone had to get the information to the PCs. The later issue revolving around her is not that dramatic as the PCs may be unimpressed with the state she is in later, or at least not highly motivated to help an NPC they only just met...

The only big consideration that I thought of on rereading it is that the premise of why the PCs are here and what are their rewards for doing so? The DM needs to take special care here to make sure that the PCs want to go on this adventure. This should not be an issue for an experienced DM as by the time they are 11-15 level the PCs have bigger concerns than getting X amount of gold for a mission... In fact being so open ended might be a boon as the DM can use this to tailor fit it to his campaign.

There is a boatload of monetary wealth here (area 36), but it is unlikely to go to the PCs, not even a fraction of it. Fortunately the author gives some flavor text as to who it actually belongs to, so this creates some nice adventure hooks as to what the PCs do with it. Any PCs of the lawful or good sides of alignment will be hard pressed to keep it as it is readily apparent that this is not the Northmen or duergar loot. Tying into this thought is that the PCs will get some monetary treasure out of this adventure, but very little in the way of magic items. This may be a plus in your campaign, however in my opinion for the level, it is a bit too skimpy. The XP award is right on however for such an epic undertaking.

In conclusion this is in my opinion a gem of a module and the top of the heap for second edition (or very near it). It acquits itself well and is well worth playing. I have left some sections generic and did not go into too much detail as I will be using this module down the line in my current campaign and give away too much.

So for those that have this or have played it, what are your thoughts?

NOTE: Link to the original review can be found here on dragonsfoot.org 

Top Twenty Greatest Villains of A Song of Ice and Fire

Like my list of the Top Twenty Greatest Warriors its now time to turn the list to those loathsome and irredeemable villains.

As you'll see some are  truly the worst of the worst, especially by the time the "top" of the list is reached. You have to give a tip of the hat to Martin. some of these villains are simply vile.

Like the list for Greatest Warriors of the Westeros, I don't expect that everyone will agree, and that's fine. But in the commentary make your case as to why each is reprehensible or maybe worse that someone else.

Top Twenty Greatest Villains of the World of A Song of Ice and Fire

1. Aegon IV, The Unworthy - The decadent king whose selfish excesses and legitimized bastards sowed generations of war.

2. Maegor I, The Cruel- A brutal tyrant who ruled through terror, blood, and the suppression of the Faith.

3. Euron Greyjoy - A chaotic, ambitious pirate king whose dark ambitions and cruelty threaten the entire realm.

4. Aerys II, The Mad King - The paranoid, fire-obsessed ruler whose cruelty and madness helped spark Robert’s Rebellion.

5. The Brave Companions (The Bloody Mummers) - A mercenary company of sadists and turncloaks who left a trail of mutilation and horror.

6. Maelys the Monstrous - The deformed Blackfyre pretender whose brutal claim nearly plunged the realm into another civil war.

7. Ramsay Bolton - A sadistic psychopath whose cruelty and psychological torment make him one of the series’ purest monsters.

8. The Mountain, Ser Gregor Clegane - A towering brute whose strength and unrelenting savagery made him a living weapon of terror

9. Joffery - The spoiled, sadistic boy-king whose casual cruelty and insecurity made him a walking disaster.

10. Cersei - The paranoid, power-hungry queen whose schemes and vindictiveness leave ruin in their wake.

11. Roose Bolton - A cold, calculating lord whose quiet ruthlessness and betrayal helped destroy House Stark.

12. Walder Frey - The treacherous, weaselly lord whose betrayal at the Red Wedding shocked the realm.

13. Craster - The wildling patriarch who practiced extremely questionable acts with his daughters and sacrificed his sons to the Others

14. Daenarys Targaryen - * - Hero at first turned villain who destroys Kings Landing on her dragon.

15. The Mountain's Men - Ser Gregor’s band of rapists and killers who spread fear and atrocity across the Riverlands.  

16. Biter - A cannibalistic brute whose animalistic violence left a lasting mark of horror.

17. Petyr Baelish, Littlefinger - The master manipulator whose ambition and chaos-making reshape the game itself. Perhaps the finest player of the Game of Thrones.

18. The Tickler - The sadistic interrogator whose methods of torture became infamous in the Riverlands.

19. Amory Lorch -The child-murdering knight responsible for the deaths of Elia Martell’s children.

20. Viserys Targaryen - The bitter, entitled Beggar King whose cruelty and delusion made him a danger to all around him.

* I include the television version of Daenerys here. There is simply no way to explain away her decision to destroy King’s Landing after the city had already surrendered. The turn was built throughout the later seasons, some fans still refuse to accept it, but the evidence is right there on screen. In the books she has not crossed that line (yet), so this ranking reflects the completed show arc.

In time I'll perhaps build out individual pots on all twenty.

 How about you? Insights as to what I got wrong or right on this list? Let me know in the comments. 

 

Series Review - Jack Whyte’s Camulod Chronicles

All nine novels of the main series

 

In terms of book series, Jack Whyte's Camulod Chronicles (also known as A Dream of Eagles) is incredibly underrated. As I wrote here fifteen years or so ago, I was amazed by what page-turners these books were, and still are. The two biggest writers in fantasy are JRR Tolkien and GRR Martin, of course, but while the Camulod Chronicles is not strictly fantasy, being more historical fiction, it is certainly adjacent to the genre. And in my opinion ranks up there. 

While Tolkien imagined a world unlike anything that had come before and Martin delves into incredible detail, what Whyte does is take the Arthurian legends and weave stories that are remarkably plausible as explanations for how those legends were passed down to us. It was revelatory the first time I read them. I was struck by just how "simple" it could be to take history, give it a bit of thought, and explain the origins of myth and folklore.

I applaud Whyte for doing this because, while I use the word "simple," no one else had thought of this masterstroke.

Encompassing nine books in total, the series takes the reader from the latter days of Roman Britain and the withdrawal of the legions through the close of Arthur's reign in the final book.

The books are in the following order:

#	Title	Publication Year
1	The Skystone	1992
2	The Singing Sword	1993
3	The Eagles' Brood	1994
4	The Saxon Shore	1995
5	The Fort at River's Bend	1999
6	Metamorphosis	1999
7	Uther	2001
8	The Lance Thrower	2004
9	The Eagle	2005

 

NOTE: I have not read the prequel The Burning Stone (released in 2019) so I can not speak to that novel, but by all accounts I have read, it's a fine addition to the series.

 

The Books

I won't go into too much detail about the books, as I don't want to spoil them for readers. What I will say is that you will probably be surprised by when Arthur finally shows up.

The first book, The Skystone, pulls you in immediately, dealing with Publius Varrus, a centurion who makes his way back to his homeland of Britain in the waning days of the Empire. From there the series spans the founding of Camulod (Camelot), the rise of Caius Merlyn Brittanicus (Merlin), the Lady of the Lake, Excalibur, and eventually the arrival of Clothar the Frank (Lancelot).

In each case, whether Arthur is present or not, Whyte manages to weave the story in such a way that his presence is never far from the forefront. That isn't to say the other characters don't matter. Quite the contrary. Many are outstanding in their own right, but there is always the sense of what they are building toward.

Another aspect of the series that I really liked is the backdrop. By that I mean Rome's Empire slowly crumbling. It isn't sudden but a long, slow decline as the years grind on. You can feel it happening, and yet the people still think of themselves as Roman. It is the fringes of Britain that begin to change first, and once again those changes are tied to Arthur one way or another.

By the time the reader reaches Books 8 and 9, the tale has become sweeping in both scope and detail, but the ending is one we are already familiar with. I say familiar, but not necessarily what you might expect from Arthurian stories. It is entirely in keeping with the way Whyte tells the story and makes for a fitting conclusion.

I realize I haven't gone into much detail, and that is intentional. The best way to experience this series is simply to read it and let it unfold. It is, in my opinion, one of those rare series where I wish I could go back and experience it again for the first time.

It's that good.

Gaming Uses

As to how this book series relates to gaming, Dragon #257 focuses on Dark Ages Briton and is practically an unofficial campaign source book. By that I mean the green-covered Historical Reference books for 2nd Edition AD&D, HR1 through HR7. Yes, I know the HR numbering technically ended at HR5. Using Dragon #257 along with other appropriate resources gives a Dungeon Master the makings of a great campaign.

For my own part, I have run a Dark Ages campaign set in a world of my own devising. The level of technology mirrored the setting perfectly, and a good example of the style of fortifications involved is the Dark Ages fortresss I built for the campaign.

Another connection is that old gaming warhorse, the 1st Edition Deities and Demigods hardcover and the Arthurian knights presented within. With a few tweaks to their weapons and armor, a DM can quickly assemble a number of ready-made NPCs.

An even further tie-in is the movie Arthur. The story aligns closely enough with Whyte's interpretation that it could easily provide additional adventures, encounters, or quest ideas.

An even easier path might be to skip AD&D altogether and simply use the Pendragon RPG. I'm most familiar with the 4th Edition of the game, and while it can get a bit crunchy in terms of the rules, the core rule book contains almost everything needed to run a campaign. The only other supplement I'd consider essential would be Saxons! for the same rule system.

Closing Thoughts

Some readers might take umbrage with my placing Whyte alongside the literary luminaries I mentioned earlier. Of course, that's just my opinion, but one that I hope people will explore and decide for themselves.

Whyte's writing style is highly engaging and pulls the reader in with detail, but never so much that it becomes overwhelming.

The pull through the pages is inexorable but never a chore. Even at a moderate reading pace, it is easy to finish a book in a week or so. Unless you're like me and simply can't put the series down. As I noted in my original post on The Skystone, it only took me two days to finish.

There you have it, a very high-level review of the series without venturing into major spoilers. If you're looking for a good series to read or inspiration for your next role-playing campaign, you could do far worse than the Camulod Chronicles.

Those are my thoughts on the Camulod Chronicles. Did I get it right?

Weird War II – After Action Report: The Failure of Operation Overlord

Years ago I discussed here how Weird War is a setting I'd LOVE to run.

As a campaign starter here is an idea I'm freely throwing out there for anyone to use to kick off one of their games. I've done it previously with a Roman Campaign idea for Majorian or for the New Shadow for Lord of the Rings.

Enter the Savage Worlds rules along with the Weird War II rulebook. 

In this case, imagine Operation Overlord failed. It fails not for the "normal" reasons, but because of the Weird War ones/ You know the beaches swarming with Axis zombies, wehrwolves and stitches along in additional to the rest of the Wehrmacht dug in along the Atlantic Wall.

Imagine if you will this memorandum prepared after the bloody repulse of the troops and the stories circulating among the ranks. Enter the PCs and having to land clandestinely in Europe to figure out just what the hell went wrong.

To: Major General Walter A. Smith From: Lieutenant Colonel William Thomas, 15th Army, 114th Special Operations Command Report filed: June 27th, 1944 Regarding: Failure of Operation Overlord, June 6th, 1944

TOP SECRET – For your eyes only.

General,

As you well know, the Allied invasion of Normandy was a disaster. Despite meticulous planning by SHAEF, everything that could go wrong did. Losses were far higher than even the worst projections. Allied planners are at a loss to explain why the landings failed so completely.

After-action reports chronicle the meager forces extracted from the beaches after just four days of fighting. The French Resistance carried out their missions, but like the soldiers on the beaches, they ultimately failed.

Worse, the reports suggest something far more sinister. Soldiers told of firing multiple rounds into German infantrymen: blowing off limbs only for them to keep coming. Only flamethrowers and bazookas brought some down. Pillboxes spilled out armies of shambling corpses that attacked with gruesome wounds. Despite the carnage, the invasion clawed its way inland.

As the advance continued, seaborne troops linked up with scattered paratroopers. Fighting intensified. Field hospitals were overwhelmed with bite wounds rather than gunshot or shrapnel injuries. Survivors described horrors in jumbled, near-catatonic terms. Then a massive North Atlantic storm rolled in, grounding Allied airpower.

Resistance along the beachhead fractured. Reports flooded in not just of Tigers and panzergrenadiers, but of hulking stitched-together brutes, mechanical soldiers, and other impossible horrors. While the front was stretched to the breaking point, the true enemy struck from the rear.

Men began dying in ever-increasing numbers from infected bite wounds. The dead rose from hasty graves and attacked their former comrades. The 203rd General Hospital was overrun. All medical support collapsed. Simultaneously, the 21st Panzer Division broke through and raced toward the Channel.

Split in two, Allied forces streamed back to the beaches in chaos. Evacuations began the night of June 10th/11th under extreme duress. Outbreaks occurred on several transports, forcing harsh quarantines and disposals. At least the contagion was contained.

The contingency plans of Operation Crosswire and Nightshade were activated. Success was achieved, and after two months all port facilities in the [CENSORED] area remain secure. Recommendation of immediate dispatch of [CENSORED] to France to reconnoiter and make contact with the [CENSORED] partisans.

My command has covertly observed and interviewed survivors as directed. The stories are too bewildering to dismiss. The Office of Special Investigations has been notified and is pursuing further understanding of the ramifications. Material losses and casualty figures remain incomplete.

This office has returned to Operations Mode Alpha and stands by for further instructions.

Respectfully submitted, Lieutenant Colonel William Thomas 18th Army Group, 114th Special Operations Command July 29th, 1944

Prepared by Lieutenant Susan Winters, Assistant Adjutant, 114th Special Operations Command

 The PCs have to parachute in or perhaps be deployed by boat. Either presents opportunities for the Game Master to spring other monsters on them as they infiltrate. Perhaps ultimately needing to find the lair or strange Third Reich science run amuk?

 What do you think? A good way to kick off a Weird War II campaign?

1st Edition AD&D Dragon Assault: When Cats Save the Day

A recent thread on RPG Pub caught my attention, dealing with dragons and defending a settlement in a quasi medieval world from winged death on wings.

What got me thinking was the type of dragon assaulting the city and in what game system matters a lot. A REAL lot.Also, what type of breath weapon does the dragon have? Traditional fire and smoke of the concussive, napalm nuclear stuff of Game of Thrones/House of the Dragon?

As AD&D is the focus of a lot of the older players gaming sites I decided to ponder it from a 1st Edition AD&D perspective. 

Personally, defensive fortifications is something of an obsession for me over the decades in 1st Edition ADD. And after all these years? Its a LOT of work from magic, to underground races to yes, flying creatures assaulting the battlements. 

Three helpful Dragon magazines on the subject are:

• Dragon #145 - Theme "A Knight's home is his castle"
• Dragon #160 - Theme "Who stalk the streets, are stalked as well"
• Dragon #224 -  Theme "Fantastic Architecture"

In short, because there are high number of monsters in the game system, magic items and spells that allow for ease of assault, the means for defense has to be likewise high. 

So with all this in mind there was there I looked at page and it hit me, read on.

First Post

Willmark posted: Oh and one thing just caught my eye, if we go rules as written in 1st edition AD&D? Read closely page 29 for dragon ages in the Monster Manual. The DM rolls a single die on number appearing. You could get anything from age 1 (Young) to age 8 (Ancient)! Equal chances for each one.

Of course this in an of itself could be really amusing: "Guards man the ramparts! Summon the mages to their positions and draw the ballista and await my command to fire!

Baby dragon comes winging in... Captain of the Guard "Uhhhhhhh…”

Now sure the DM can adjust this so Smaug's grand kids doesn't come winging in looking for a snack and ending up as a juicy turkey special at the local dive But the point remains, rules as written it could happen.

And if a hatchling does mange to wobble its way into the city? Forget the fact that even normal weaponry can hurt a dragon in 1st edition. Why even bother? Just send in that uber-bad-ass of low level monsters in 1st Edition: the domestic cat!

That's right, you read it right: the cat. You know, that monster that has more hit points that most first level magic users?

The domestic cat: No. Appearing: 2-12, AC:6, MV 5", Hit Dice: 1-5 hit point, Attacks 2, Damage 1-2/1-2 Special Attacks: rear claw rakes 1-2/1-2 

With that in mind consider the following.

Second Post

Willmark posted: Building on my thoughts and the wackiness of the random nature of dragon age under Rules As Written.

That very young eight hit point dragon that might show up? What if it meets the most terrifying monster in Monster Manual II? the domestic cat with two attacks plus possibly two more from the rear claws; number appearing of two to twelve. 

It just so happens there are ten of them in this scenario. Read on.

Part 1- The City is Alerted... Dragon Inbound!
The alarm sounded wildly across the walls as men scrambled to their posts throughout the vast city.

"Dragon sighted!" shouted the lookout, voice cracking just enough to be unhelpful. "Coming in low!"

The Captain of the Guard stormed up the ramparts, hand casually on his sword hilt as if he had done this many times before. "Man the ballista! Archers to the wall! Summon the mages…where in the hell are the mages?!"

A corporal instantly appeared (they always do at just the right time). "Sir! The mages are…indisposed."

The Captain narrowed his eyes. "Define exactly what indisposed means.'"

"They're at the Shady Gutter, sir. Something about arcane research and a drinking contest."

The Captain closed his eyes for a long, painful second while rubbing his temples . "Of course they are."

A distant screech echoed through the air. All heads turned skyward.

The dragon crested the horizon. All eyes squinting and straining to catch a glimpse of the fearsome beast on the way to lay waste to their city.

It was…small. VERY small.

The Captain blinked. "That's...IT?"

The lookout squinted. "Yes, sir. Very…enthusiastic, though."

The dragon gave a high pitched roar that sounded more like a kettle thinking about boiling.

A nearby soldier whispered, "I've seen bigger chickens."

"Quiet!" barked the Captain; he was in agreement, but couldn't show it to the rank and file.

The dragon swooped closer, wobbling slightly mid-flight, and let out a puff of flame that slightly singed a banner and immediately sputtered out.

A pause.

The Captain slowly turned to the corporal. "Where are the recruits…they need some…practice"

"Sir…they too are at the Shady Gutter..."

Another pause. Longer this time and the Captain shook his head. "Of course they are."

He stared at the approaching creature, then back at his men, then off toward the city.

"Very well," he said at last. "Stand down the ballista."

The corporal hesitated. "Sir?"

"You heard me. Stand. Them. Down."

The dragon attempted another roar and clipped a chimney. Its wobbly flight continued.

The Captain rubbed his temples again, a growing headache coming on. "Go into the city."

"Sir?"

"Find me…several…cats."

The corporal blinked. "Cats, sir?"

"Yes, corporal. Cats. Small, fast, angry, and sober. Unlike anyone currently in this garrison."

The corporal saluted slowly. "Yes, sir. Cats."

The dragon landed awkwardly in the square, claws scraping stone as it tried very hard to look imposing. It puffed itself up, wings flaring with all the confidence of something that had never been told "no," and let out another defiant roar.

It echoed.

It accomplished nothing.

A shutter creaked open somewhere above. An old woman leaned out, squinted, and shut it again.

Moments later, almost effortlessly a cat slinked around a statue nearby. It looked at the dragon. The dragon looked at the cat.

Then another cat appeared. A third, until several were now milling about.

The first cat finished with its paw and sat, tail wrapped neatly around its feet, regarding the dragon with a kind of detached curiosity usually reserved for mildly interesting furniture.

The Captain folded his arms, watching from the wall.

"Well," he muttered, "let's see how this plays out."

There was a brief flurry of motion, some indignant screeching, a few offended yowls, and a surprising amount of hissing.

Then silence.

The corporal returned, slightly out of breath. "Sir…target appears to be…neutralized."

The Captain nodded gravely. He peered down into the square, where three cats now lounged atop the dragon with supreme satisfaction "…commend the cats," he said.

The corporal leaned over the wall, then straightened. "Sir, they are ignoring me."

The Captain allowed himself the faintest smile. "Of course they are."

He turned back to his men.

"Stand down. And someone fetch the mages…and bring milk."

Part 2- The City is Defended...by...cats?

Meanwhile on the Ramparts...

The "battle" below had settled into something…difficult to categorize.

A few guards leaned over the parapet, watching with mild interest.

The Captain didn't look down.

"Odds?" he asked.

The quartermaster didn't hesitate. "Cats are two to one favorites, sir."

The Captain nodded once, as if this confirmed a long-held suspicion. He reached into his pouch, produced a leather purse with the unmistakable heavy clink of coin within, and slammed it onto the stone.

"Bet this month's wages on the cats. All in."

The corporal blinked. "Sir?"

The Captain didn't even look at him.

"You heard me."

Below, there was a brief, offended screech, followed by a chorus of hisses and the unmistakable sound of something losing very quickly.

The quartermaster leaned slightly, peering over the edge. "Movement suggests the cats are pressing their advantage, sir."

"Good," said the Captain calmly.

Another pause.

The corporal rubbed his forehead. "Sir…is this…standard protocol?"

The Captain folded his arms.

"It is now."

A beat.

From below? Silence.

The quartermaster straightened. "Outcome appears decided, sir."

The Captain allowed himself the faintest nod. "See?" he said. "Reliable assets."

The corporal sighed quietly, already imagining the paperwork, "…I'm going to need a new column on the duty roster."

 

Part 3- The "Triumph" at the Shady Gutter Tavern

The Shady Gutter tavern sagged under the weight of its own questionable life choices. Tankards lay overturned, a wizard snored face-down in a spell book, and two recruits were arguing with a chair that had, by all accounts, been winning for several hours.

It was, as usual, impossible to tell who was ahead.

The door slammed open.

The Captain of the Guard strode in, armor still dusty, expression carved from equal parts triumph and disbelief.

A mage lifted his head an inch. "Did we…win?"

The Captain paused.

"…Yes."

A recruit squinted. "Did we fire the ballista?"

"No."

"Archers?"

"No."

"Magic?"

The Captain glanced at the unconscious wizard drooling into his sleeve. "…not as such."

The tavern fell into a puzzled silence.

From behind him, the corporal stepped in more quietly, running the numbers in his head for tomorrow's roll call.

"Sir," he muttered, low enough that only the Captain could hear, "how would you like me to write this up?"

The Captain didn't even hesitate.

"Decisive action," he said. "Efficient use of local assets."

The corporal closed his eyes briefly. "Of course, sir."

Outside, in the square, the aftermath remained.

The dragon lay where it had fallen; a small, unimpressive thing that had arrived with grand intentions and departed as a footnote.

Draped across it, the cats rested in various states of satisfied indifference.

One blinked slowly at nothing in particular.

Another cleaned a paw with meticulous focus.

A third lay stretched along the flank, making full use of the lingering warmth while being quietly annoyed at its steady dissipation.

They looked, as they always did: mildly disappointed in the world, and vaguely pleased with themselves.

Back inside, the Captain raised a tankard.

"To the defense of the city!"

"To the defense!" came the ragged reply.

The corporal stared into his drink.

"…I'm putting them on the roster," he muttered.

A pause.

"…and requisitioning milk."

(The End)

Conclusion?

I'm not sure other than the system one is playing in makes all the difference in the world when once considers the age of question of a dragon assaulting a city. Granted I made an absurd story out of the whole thing but the point stands.

In A Lord of the Rings game, Smaug might show up. In 1st edition AD&D fluffy and his friends are wiping out a hatchling before noon.

1st Edition Warhammer Fantasy Role-play? Well...I'm not sure you could wake even wake it up. 

There you have it. What this illustrates is that "can a dragon lay waste to a city?" The smart answer is "maybe" because (RAW) Rules As Written? They can produce some amusing results.

 Let me know your thoughts.